Don’t Assume And Wish Me Happy Father’s Day.

Father’s day is approaching and you will see more  mother’s being wished Happy Father’s Day than actual men. I started noticing this when people would wish me this. For some reason it would annoy me. First, you’re assuming that I’m a single parent. No, I am not. My son has a great father and I know so many awesome men that are great. That spend time with children and nurture and provide for them.

Yes, there are many mothers  with out fathers for their children, but we don’t give men enough credit. The role of men not being strong, or simply not being there, has played a narrative for a long time. We simply look pass those who are great men. Who know their roles as husbands and fathers.

Image cred Pinterest. Com

Negative and positive plays a role in all cultures and in both genders. For every bad father there is an equal amount of bad mothers. Leaving men to be single parents as well. Do we talk about the women like that. We still wish them Happy Mother’s Day simply because they gave birth, which is wrong. Please  I’ll say if you’re not shit in a second, but can still point out your positive attributes. So this is not a bashing session.

@justbwlr and beautiful daughters

We have to start celebrating the “good men” just as well as we tell women to be strong and confident.  Especially if you are raising young men. Show them they can be great. Point out great men you know, or know of. Let’s stop  celebrating the negativity and shine light on the positive attributes!

Happy Father’s Day to all the great men out there!  Bless up!

Posting A Meme Isn’t Going To Change The Way He Deals With You.

tumblr_mwahnxIW3W1ql5yr7o1_r1_500.gifOh, he thinks that he can treat me this way. Let me get on all forms of social media and post memes of how I feel. Honey, he or she is probably not even going to see or care. Why do we think that’s relationship etiquette. He probably will like a picture when you put on something right again. Take a breather and re-evaluate the situation or situationship.

Set your standard of how one treats you. Is probably a better solution of communicating what you’re not dealing with. We have replaced our dignity and self-worth with pictures. No one is a mind reader. If you’re allowing someone to come and go as they please, or  treat you in they way you don’t want. Why do you expect them to respect  a meme about a relationship?

It’s  either people are ready for certain commitments or not.  You have to be the one  to decide if you’re in for the games.  Being sure of yourself can let a person change as well, if they want too.  Even though a person might come to play,  they can see that they won’t be able to win at these games and change for the better. The time that we take to try to make others see the value in us, should be invested in you. Seeking the value in yourself first. That’s when everything starts to make sense. Real men and women are not interested in the interaction of weakness and insecurities. Only those  who are settlers, unsure, and not ready are.

The image that God created you in, which is the image of him and all his glory. That wasn’t created and thought of, for it simply to be mistreated. What we must recognize is that when you against the grain, that’s when real situations appear.

There’s A Difference Between D**k Riding And Sincerely Being Genuinely Supportive.

You’re so dope. I absolutely love what you do. Keep up the good work.

Social media has open a platform where you can root for someone you don’t even know personally. Absolutely nothing wrong with that. I love to see people winning and living out their dreams. Conquering each fear one by one.

It takes nothing to give out encouragement, repost, hit the like button, donate and so on and so forth. How ever you have ones who will only do it to those who are very popular. Just trying to see if they can get close to the person or seeing if they can get put on. Don’t shoot the messenger, I’m calling it how I see it. So many times you have seen this and then the minute you haven’t recieved what you set out to get. You no longer like the person. You’re still following the person. Not because you like the content their putting out, but because you want to see if the person fails or not. Just click the damn unfollow button please.Screenshot_20180611-200346_Instagram.jpg

We are in a society where we only respect those who are doing better, rather than those who are struggling to get there and working hard. If you’re a true supporter, you would understand what it takes and root for the finish line of anyone. Women and men will start support groups and one by one it diminishes as  jealousy sets in about one another, or feels like one doesn’t deserve the achievements. Take a step back for a minute and look at yourself. It is okay to have slight jealousy, in a good way of course. Meaning you should be happy and also having the feeling, that you hope one day it can happen for you as well.

We know not the day it will happen for us. So keep your energy clean and true to yourself. You wont have to ride some else’s coat tail to get what’s meant for you.




Settle Or DO Better

Who you are now is not who you will be. We were made to evolve and grow

You’re doubting yourself again. As if you can’t step up.  No one said that achieving anything would be easy. So instead of working towards your best life, you are settling.

You’re settling for the mediocre job, being with the person that doesn’t push you or themselves, but it’s easy. Easier for you, rather than pushing yourself higher than you were. Yes, I understand we get caught in a rut sometimes. Pigeon holding us into a position or place we don’t want to be in. We must fight against whatever is holding and or keeping us back. We are our own problem. We allow fear to set in. Telling ourselves Screenshot_20180611-084712_Google.jpg we don’t deserve to do and be better. Fear is a natural feeling, staying there is not. Learn how to over come fear by taking chances on yourself and new experiences. The unknown might be greater than your current state. How else will you know?

Making a list of do’s and don’ts  sounds corny but is a great way to start. As a check list on what isn’t motivating you. Start tackling them one by one. We weren’t made to live lifestyles that doesn’t reach our full potential. I’ve learned that very thing that I’m afraid of actually sets me free.

Obtain the life you want to live by stepping out on faith. May blessings flow your way once you start.

What Is Your Relationship To Success

Because success doesn’t always equal a check.

A few weeks ago I got together with my friend Sadae for dinner.  As we exchanged casualties, she asked me how I was adjusting to the freelance life.  For me, that was a loaded, complex question.  Since I quit my job, I’ve worked on my blog and devoted a few days a week to helping my pastor out at his office.  While I try to secure writing gigs, I’ve found it to be more difficult than I originally thought.  I expressed that I didn’t think it has been a successful couple of months mainly because I wasn’t generating an income from my writing.  As I completed my thought, my friend casually suggested, “maybe you should change how you measure success.” “Huh?” I responded.  “Change the way you’re measuring success.  It’s not always going to equal a check.  Sometimes, success is completing an article, attending an event, sending a few emails.  Success doesn’t always equal money.”


As enlightened as I consider myself to be, I felt like I just found the key to life.  We have been conditioned to believe that success is found in our bank accounts.  Each post I write, every email I send, every event I attend contribute to my productivity which makes me successful.

It’s the productivity that leads to success.

If you’re an entrepreneur, consider every move you make towards growing you brand a step in the right direction.  For me, this message came right on time.  As I lay the foundation for Introvert N the City, I think it’d necessary for me to remember the journey.  The journey will ultimately lead me to success.  If you stick with consistency by remaining productive, you’ll definitely be successful!